Post by Crobdan on Jun 25, 2005 17:16:59 GMT -5
Q: Hello once again.
A: Untie me you cad!
Q: First you must answer some questions-
A: THE CRACKS IN THE TRUNK!
Q: ...for my second interview.
A: What? You don’t have to tie me up for that! Why didn’t you just tell me?
Q: I did, and you ran away. Twenty-seven times.
A: That was you?
Q: YES!
A: I believe you have some questions for me?
Q: …Uggghhh… I can’t believe my editors making me do this…
A: Excuse me?
Q: Nevermind. First question… Fans want to know-
A: What fans?
Q: Shut up. Fans want to know what’s the difference in personalities between Water and Wind.
A: …
Q: …Well?
A: You told me to shut up.
Q: Find… I’m sorry.
A: …Uncross your legs again.
Q: ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!
A: ARRGAHHH! OKAY! MYAH! The difference in personalities between Water and Wind is that Water is a smart, sorta Goth, sorta pedophile... Well, he wouldn’t have sex with a little kid, he also wouldn’t take pictures of a naked piece of jail bait if he was given the chance, he has to much honor to do that. Thought he’ll masturbate to the thought of it once he gets home. But only if the girl is over the age of fourteen, and he’s like… Twenty in the comics… and he would be either seventeen or eighteen in the Anime. Anyways, besides that sick shit, he also enjoys watching TV shows witch star young girls, like Kim Possible or… Cardcaptor Sakura… Or episode three of Magical Shopping Arcade Abenobashi! He loves that one. He also likes music sung by cute or underage girls… and Goth music… I guess.
Q: And Wind?
A: Wind is a… secret Otaku, if that’s the right word. He loves Anime, Manga, those weird porn doujinshis-
Q: Do any of your characters NOT like porn?
A: …There men… what do you expect? And don’t bring up Gun or the other girls I have yet to introduce, that would be going off topic.
Q: Fine.
A: As I was saying… Wind is also really smart, like, almost as smart as Water, he’s also an asshole like Water, but… Waters more of an asshole. Yeah. But he’s not Goth, or a pedophile!
Q: Why did you make Water a pedophile?
A: Because I could. Apparently.
Q: No really.
A: Uhhh… Why did I make him a pedophile? Hmmm… Maybe it was because… I dunno. It’s not like he would have sex with a little girl, maybe a girl that was seventeen, but that’s as low as he would go. And besides, it’s not like there’s a girl on the planet that would sleep with him anyways. In my world every girl thinks Water is a loser, no one will touch him. And he knows it. So, I guess he thinks… Why not aim his sights lower? Like, several years lower. Hey, what’da you know! I did explain it!
Q: But that’s such a horrible thing to make a character!
A: I know! And at times everyone LOVES Water! I’m trying my best to make Water a really loveable character! Even thought he’s technically a pedophile with a panty sniffing fetish! Yet there are still people who actually feel sorry for Water! It’s just so hilarious to me!
Q: …You’re an asshole.
A: I KNOW! And that makes for great writing!
Q: Matter of opinion.
A: Fuck you. Next question.
Q: Are you a pedophile?
A: Well… seeing as how I’m fifth-teen and I’m attracted to girls that are technically underage… yeah. I guess I am.
Q: …Okay, that was a stupid question.
A: Your right, next question.
Q: What’s with Fire?
A: What about him?
Q: Why’s he an idiot?
A: Because the comic would be boring if he wasn’t.
Q: Fine. That’s an expectable answer. I guess.
A: Next question.
Q: Besides nudity, violence, cussing, and pedophilia, what else will you put into the Anime if you were given the chance to make one?
A: Is that all? Damn, I thought there would be more. *Cough* Umm… What else? Hmmm… Child abuse?
Q: …What?
A: You know how like when you get on a plane, and there’s ALWAYS a baby on it, and it’s always crying? Well, if for whatever reason Fire and Water were on a plane, I would make a baby start crying, and for like ten minuets, it would just go on! I don’t care if it would be boring to the audience, they’ll watch it cause they wanna know what’s gonna happen. So it goes on for ten minuets, so Water, having been woken up by the baby’s screaming nine minuets ago, get’s tired of waiting for the little basterd to shut up on its own, so he get’s up, takes the baby away from it’s mother, and slams it against the wall of the plane until there’s nothing left but the baby’s legs and spine, then Water gives the baby back to his mother. The next day in the real world I would get thousands of letters, e-mails, and letter bombs from angry parents and religious folks from all around the world. And I would laugh.
Q: …You’re an evil child.
A: Next question.
Q: …
A: I said next question!
Q: …Uh… Wha-What… Would you really do that?
A: Yes. And the commercial advertising the show would only be that sequence of Water smashing the baby against the wall repeated over and over again. Until I and only I get sick of it. Also, Fire would eat a baby on accident in one episode, he would cut it up into smaller pieces and not notice it was a baby until Water points it out. Fire would then take seven more bites and then say “…I think your right”. Then they would all laugh and then from that point on all the rest of the episode is nothing but snuff film stock footage.
Q: …
A: …
Q: …
A: …Uncross your legs again.
Q: AHHHH! Dammit! What’s wrong with you!
A: Lot’s of things.
Q: UGH! You’re such a sick little boy!
A: Hey I’m almost sixteen!
Q: I just can’t believe-
A: NEXT QUESTION!
Q: Urrrggg… Okay… What genre would your Anime be?
A: That reminds me, there would be a movie before the Anime, it would be live action but Fire, Water and the rest of the cast would be animated, not computer generated, but more like Rodger Rabbit was. Cept with more detail. And darker. Anyways, in the movie, Water and Fire have to go to Hollywood to save Water’s ex-girlfriend, Ice. Who Water’s still in love with, anyways they have to save her, because Fire got a message saying that unless they got to Hollywood in seven days Ice would be killed. So they go on this awesome adventure getting to Hollywood, they get lost in New York, the North Poll, and they have a space battle… IN SPACE! Anyways, they go through all that and then finally, on the sixth day they arrive in Hollywood… And that’s when Fire tells Water that is was all a joke and he just wanted to go to Hollywood because they were needed to work on the Anime of Safety Misadventures! So then Water’s all like ‘………What?” so Fire says “They need us to do the voices of our characters in the Anime that there doing, the one that’s based on us?” and then Water says “……So Ice isn’t really kidnapped, and I can’t rush in and save her form her kidnappers and make her love me again?” witch Fire replies with “NOPE!”, so Water stands there for a while and then walks off saying “I’m gonna go try to kill myself again”, and then Fire says “Try not to get any blood on my car!” and then the movie ends. The Anime would then start two weeks after the movie is released. Also, the movie would begin with Fire and Water singing Technologic while driving down a secluded desert road.
Q: …I think I have enough to satisfy my editor.
A: it was good talking to you again!
Q: Don’t talk to me. (Leaves)
A: …Dammit, this is like the fifth time someone’s forgotten to untie me from something.
A: Untie me you cad!
Q: First you must answer some questions-
A: THE CRACKS IN THE TRUNK!
Q: ...for my second interview.
A: What? You don’t have to tie me up for that! Why didn’t you just tell me?
Q: I did, and you ran away. Twenty-seven times.
A: That was you?
Q: YES!
A: I believe you have some questions for me?
Q: …Uggghhh… I can’t believe my editors making me do this…
A: Excuse me?
Q: Nevermind. First question… Fans want to know-
A: What fans?
Q: Shut up. Fans want to know what’s the difference in personalities between Water and Wind.
A: …
Q: …Well?
A: You told me to shut up.
Q: Find… I’m sorry.
A: …Uncross your legs again.
Q: ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!
A: ARRGAHHH! OKAY! MYAH! The difference in personalities between Water and Wind is that Water is a smart, sorta Goth, sorta pedophile... Well, he wouldn’t have sex with a little kid, he also wouldn’t take pictures of a naked piece of jail bait if he was given the chance, he has to much honor to do that. Thought he’ll masturbate to the thought of it once he gets home. But only if the girl is over the age of fourteen, and he’s like… Twenty in the comics… and he would be either seventeen or eighteen in the Anime. Anyways, besides that sick shit, he also enjoys watching TV shows witch star young girls, like Kim Possible or… Cardcaptor Sakura… Or episode three of Magical Shopping Arcade Abenobashi! He loves that one. He also likes music sung by cute or underage girls… and Goth music… I guess.
Q: And Wind?
A: Wind is a… secret Otaku, if that’s the right word. He loves Anime, Manga, those weird porn doujinshis-
Q: Do any of your characters NOT like porn?
A: …There men… what do you expect? And don’t bring up Gun or the other girls I have yet to introduce, that would be going off topic.
Q: Fine.
A: As I was saying… Wind is also really smart, like, almost as smart as Water, he’s also an asshole like Water, but… Waters more of an asshole. Yeah. But he’s not Goth, or a pedophile!
Q: Why did you make Water a pedophile?
A: Because I could. Apparently.
Q: No really.
A: Uhhh… Why did I make him a pedophile? Hmmm… Maybe it was because… I dunno. It’s not like he would have sex with a little girl, maybe a girl that was seventeen, but that’s as low as he would go. And besides, it’s not like there’s a girl on the planet that would sleep with him anyways. In my world every girl thinks Water is a loser, no one will touch him. And he knows it. So, I guess he thinks… Why not aim his sights lower? Like, several years lower. Hey, what’da you know! I did explain it!
Q: But that’s such a horrible thing to make a character!
A: I know! And at times everyone LOVES Water! I’m trying my best to make Water a really loveable character! Even thought he’s technically a pedophile with a panty sniffing fetish! Yet there are still people who actually feel sorry for Water! It’s just so hilarious to me!
Q: …You’re an asshole.
A: I KNOW! And that makes for great writing!
Q: Matter of opinion.
A: Fuck you. Next question.
Q: Are you a pedophile?
A: Well… seeing as how I’m fifth-teen and I’m attracted to girls that are technically underage… yeah. I guess I am.
Q: …Okay, that was a stupid question.
A: Your right, next question.
Q: What’s with Fire?
A: What about him?
Q: Why’s he an idiot?
A: Because the comic would be boring if he wasn’t.
Q: Fine. That’s an expectable answer. I guess.
A: Next question.
Q: Besides nudity, violence, cussing, and pedophilia, what else will you put into the Anime if you were given the chance to make one?
A: Is that all? Damn, I thought there would be more. *Cough* Umm… What else? Hmmm… Child abuse?
Q: …What?
A: You know how like when you get on a plane, and there’s ALWAYS a baby on it, and it’s always crying? Well, if for whatever reason Fire and Water were on a plane, I would make a baby start crying, and for like ten minuets, it would just go on! I don’t care if it would be boring to the audience, they’ll watch it cause they wanna know what’s gonna happen. So it goes on for ten minuets, so Water, having been woken up by the baby’s screaming nine minuets ago, get’s tired of waiting for the little basterd to shut up on its own, so he get’s up, takes the baby away from it’s mother, and slams it against the wall of the plane until there’s nothing left but the baby’s legs and spine, then Water gives the baby back to his mother. The next day in the real world I would get thousands of letters, e-mails, and letter bombs from angry parents and religious folks from all around the world. And I would laugh.
Q: …You’re an evil child.
A: Next question.
Q: …
A: I said next question!
Q: …Uh… Wha-What… Would you really do that?
A: Yes. And the commercial advertising the show would only be that sequence of Water smashing the baby against the wall repeated over and over again. Until I and only I get sick of it. Also, Fire would eat a baby on accident in one episode, he would cut it up into smaller pieces and not notice it was a baby until Water points it out. Fire would then take seven more bites and then say “…I think your right”. Then they would all laugh and then from that point on all the rest of the episode is nothing but snuff film stock footage.
Q: …
A: …
Q: …
A: …Uncross your legs again.
Q: AHHHH! Dammit! What’s wrong with you!
A: Lot’s of things.
Q: UGH! You’re such a sick little boy!
A: Hey I’m almost sixteen!
Q: I just can’t believe-
A: NEXT QUESTION!
Q: Urrrggg… Okay… What genre would your Anime be?
A: That reminds me, there would be a movie before the Anime, it would be live action but Fire, Water and the rest of the cast would be animated, not computer generated, but more like Rodger Rabbit was. Cept with more detail. And darker. Anyways, in the movie, Water and Fire have to go to Hollywood to save Water’s ex-girlfriend, Ice. Who Water’s still in love with, anyways they have to save her, because Fire got a message saying that unless they got to Hollywood in seven days Ice would be killed. So they go on this awesome adventure getting to Hollywood, they get lost in New York, the North Poll, and they have a space battle… IN SPACE! Anyways, they go through all that and then finally, on the sixth day they arrive in Hollywood… And that’s when Fire tells Water that is was all a joke and he just wanted to go to Hollywood because they were needed to work on the Anime of Safety Misadventures! So then Water’s all like ‘………What?” so Fire says “They need us to do the voices of our characters in the Anime that there doing, the one that’s based on us?” and then Water says “……So Ice isn’t really kidnapped, and I can’t rush in and save her form her kidnappers and make her love me again?” witch Fire replies with “NOPE!”, so Water stands there for a while and then walks off saying “I’m gonna go try to kill myself again”, and then Fire says “Try not to get any blood on my car!” and then the movie ends. The Anime would then start two weeks after the movie is released. Also, the movie would begin with Fire and Water singing Technologic while driving down a secluded desert road.
Q: …I think I have enough to satisfy my editor.
A: it was good talking to you again!
Q: Don’t talk to me. (Leaves)
A: …Dammit, this is like the fifth time someone’s forgotten to untie me from something.